II Samuel 13:20 reads, “Then Absalom her
brother said to her, "Has Amnon your brother been with
you? But now keep silent, my sister, he is your brother;
do not take this matter to heart. SoTamar remained and was
desolate in her brother Absalom's house.” (NAS)
Tamar’s brother Amnon was captivated by her beauty
and burned in his lust towards her. He feigned illness and
sent his servant to deliver his request for her assistance.
Tamar had no reason to be concerned when she learned her
brother was sick and requested her assistance. After she
arrived, Amnon removed the mask and requested that she engage
in intimacy with him.
Tamar implores his reasoning by telling him that he’s
her brother. She fervidly reminds him that such debauchery
is forbidden by law; his outrageous lust is wickedness in
the highest degree and will not be tolerated in Israel.
She also says to Amnon that such atrocities should not be
committed by the people of God.
Tamar appeals to his conscious by entreating him not to
force her to participate in this lewd act. She asks him,
“how can I avoid the shame once this becomes public;
have you considered my honor, my dignity, my comfort?”
The arguments by Tamar are so strong that had Amnon not
been goaded on by his lust, they might have prevailed with
him to desist from his infamous purpose. After imposing
himself and afterwards looking upon her with disdain, he
discarded her like she was a piece of trash.
Broken, wounded and shamed, Tamar took the robe that signified
her virginity and violently ripped it to shreds. This action
was an outward expression of what took place inwardly. The
garment she once wore is now a tattered symbol of what she
was…a proud virgin and woman of dignity.
Like Tamar, you had no grounds to even think that a friend,
family member or a person of the household of faith would
view you as an opportunity to fulfill their debased desire.
When offered the opportunity to serve or just hang out,
the voice of your past had no reason to distrust the preacher,
church mother or deacon; sibling, relative, parent or grandparent;
teacher, neighbor or friend. Then it happened!
Suddenly your confidence is betrayed. Your innocence is
violently snatched away. Like Tamar, you ferociously shred
all symbols of success, worthiness and purity. Bewildered
and dismayed, your life shattered, you at these symbols
that once represented the positive in your life and cry,
“Why did this happen to me!”
The feelings of being abandoned violated and defrauded;
betrayed, victimized and abused; guilt, shame and cheap
overwhelm you like a mighty hurricane! The anguish of encroachment
replaces the radiance of innocence that once upon a time
lit up your face. Incest is woven into the tapestry of your
life against your will. There appears to be no escape from
Your perpetrator continues to display an uncaring attitude
by threatening you to be silent so they can remain in their
secret closet of depravity. While the apparent inescapable
pain of this contravention hovers over you emotionally and
physically, you walk in fear of retribution if you expose
your perpetrator. Therefore, you cry in silence.
There is no pain in existence too great for Jesus to heal;
no heart too broken that he cannot repair, no trust too
obliterated that he cannot rebuild. Come to the incessantly
flowing waters of healing and restoration. Accept his invitation
to walk with him in the process of repairing your deep-wounded
soul and restore your life. His loving hand of forgiveness
and mercy is also extended towards the perpetrator. Accept
his invitation to transform your life from perpetrator to
protector; abuser to lover; untrustworthy to a person of
Have a Purpose Driven Month.
P.S. Always remember…Worship is a lifestyle, not
a momentary experience.
Word-Song Ministries provides ministry to churches in the
areas of the spoken word, church restructuring, worship
seminars and guest psalmist. Word-Song Foundation promotes
concerts that transform lives through christian music and
motivational speaking. To contact Rev. Brown, email him
Copyright © 2006. All Rights Reserved.
Used by permission, BlackandChristian.com, 2006